Make the most of this courtship period, once married these men change completely,’ my aunt said as she sipped on her evening kaapi. I heard her, looked into my phone and remember texting my then fiancé and now husband asking him if he intended to change after marriage. ‘No baby, why should I change? I will always be the same.’ came the reply almost instantly. 
Today, it’s been 6 odd years of being married and not only has that lightning speed of replying to text messages vanished but with that a lot of things have changed. Am I complaining? Yes and no. 

While the relationship has changed and evolved, I do miss the the spontaneity that a new relationship brings with it. Just the other day my husband says to me, “did you buy flowers?” This while I had got flowers almost three days ago and were placed in various vases at home. “Bought them myself given I don’t get any from you now,” I said pushing my luck. “Also, I bought these three days ago,” I added. “Wow, I didn’t even notice,” he said. 

So caught up we often get in our routine of work and children that we sometimes forget to notice the things around us. 

So what is it that I miss from 6 years ago? That’s the thing, I cannot seem to really put my finger on it. It could just be the time we had then, most of our time now goes in bringing up the two boys. 

Am I happy? Hell, yes I am 🙂 and who says change is a bad thing? Embrace it, and if you don’t like it, ensure you are vocal enough about it. Don’t sulk or crib about it. Take charge and see the world of difference it makes to your life, lady! 

P.S.- husband, if you are reading this, flowers and other material display of love and affection is always welcome. So do keep that in mind. 


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